I’m Just Going to Highlight the Important Parts

Jack Reddecliff, Contributing Writer|November 17, 2017

 

  1. You do need sleep, go to sleep.
  2. You can’t sleep 3 hours a night and function.
  3. Coffee isn’t a replacement for sleep.
  4. When stress drinking don’t choose liquor.
  5. When stress drinking and you do choose liquor, try not to puke on your computer.
  6. Have a glass of wine instead.
  7. Not 6 glasses of wine.
  8. When stress eating, do it until you feel bad about it then have another handful before you stop.
  9. Ice cream is never a bad idea. Seriously.
  10. Always go to practice if you’re on a team, they are paying you, they own you.
  11. You can always retake a class.
  12. Don’t retake the class, take the grade.
  13. Plenty of people get jobs without college degrees.
  14. Serving coffee isn’t that bad.
  15. Pay your bills or they will make it hard to live in your house.
  16. Don’t tell your republican roommate he’s an idiot. He just won’t get it.
  17. Tell your liberal roommate he’s an idiot, he probably didn’t do his dishes.
  18. Make sure you tell everyone how much you drink & how much sex you have, everyone wants to know.
  19. They don’t want to know, I promise.
  20. Have fun, not too much fun though, you can take another lecture, not parole.
  21. Write until you can’t, take advantage of all the inspiration you can whenever you can.
  22. Cover your notes in doodles, they will be worth a lot when you’re famous.
  23. You’re better than you give yourself credit for.
  24. Be proud of yourself, you are doing your best.